I am reading a book called A Praying Life, by Paul E. Miller–some leaders in our church are going through it. Miller motivates me to want to really access the heart of God. He writes a whole chapter on cynicism, a huge obstacle in experiencing the intimacy of prayer with our Father.
“Cynics imagine they are disinterested observers on a quest for authenticity. They assume they are humble because they offer nothing. In fact, they feel deeply superior because they think they see through everything. ”
“C.S. Lewis pointed out that if you see through everything, you eventually see nothing.
‘You cannot go on “explaining away” for ever: you will find that you have explained explanation itself away. You cannot go on “seeing through” things for ever. The whole point of seeing through something is to see something through it… If you see through everything, then everything is transparent. But a wholly transparent world is an invisible world. To “see through” all things is the same as not to see.’ ”
Oh the thousands of times I have been in this place of cynicism. How I have prided myself in thinking that I know better than those who “live in naive optimism”, because I see how it really is…but what I fail to realize is that I am blinded by my cynicism which doesn’t allow me to see God’s greater story continuously unfolding around me. Breaking the cycle of cynicism is to move towards the heart of God in prayer and repentance, seeing through my self and asking God to help keep my eyes fixed on Jesus.